Death, divorce and moving house are said to be the three most stressful situations in life. I often wonder where peak-hour traffic comes in? Or accidentally sending the naughty email meant for your better half to the entire office? But let’s not get side-tracked. I remember when my husband and I moved into our first flat. How romantic, I thought. Our very first nest of luurve. Little did I know that by the time we actually moved in, he would hardly be allowed inside the flat, let alone the bedroom. Why you ask? It all started with packing boxes. You see, I’m pedantic about wrapping my ornaments from Indonesia and the throw-pillows I bought in Turkey in tissue paper and clearly marking the boxes “KITCHEN”, “BEDROOM” or “LOUNGE”. The love of my life, on the other hand, thinks this is unnecessary. To my complete and utter horror he packed his cordless drill and monkey wrench together with my Egyptian cotton sheets. Those, by the way, cost me an entire month’s salary.
Me: “Um honey, could you please come here for a sec?”
Him: “Yes sweet pea?”
Me: “What the hell is this?”
Me: “This...this...thing in between my sheets!”
Him: “It’s actually called a shifting spanner.”
And so I proceeded to beat him over the head with his precious shifting spanner.
So, in order to avoid any issues of domestic violence while moving house, I recommend the following:
1. Book a good removal company. You can save money by packing your own belongings but get someone to help you with the big bulky items.
2. Don’t move with furniture that won’t fit into your new home. Ever heard of a measuring tape?
3. Contact all the utility companies and your bank with your new address.
4. Telephone companies are sloooow. Make sure you book well in advance and remind them a few days before the move.
5. Pack a bag with enough items to get through the first couple of days in your new home. Digging through countless boxes to find socks is not fun,
6 Label boxes clearly with what’s inside. Note to self: marking a box as “odds and ends” or “random stuff” is a bad idea.
7. Remember, Rome wasn’t built in a day, Don’t try to do everything all at once. Stick to a plan.
Finally and most importantly, keep a cold bottle of wine nearby. Screw cap, of course!